What you want materially and what you want spiritually are both important, says John Gray, Ph.D., in How to Get What You Want and Want What You Have. "Wanting more is the nature of our soul, mind, heart, and senses," he says. As an antidote of sorts to the sometimes overly strict books of late that advocate a life of utter simplicity, he concedes that it's okay to want a big promotion or fancy car. It's also noble to want a solid spiritual life and to want to be at peace with yourself. However, he says, you need to recognize and work on the many self-defeating behaviors that may be thwarting your chances for reaching your goals. In fact, he identifies 24 typical stumbling blocks to look for.